Before you remember how to be yourself and so instead are so much more.

I love when you meet for brunch and you haven’t been home yet.

I love that messy space between happiness and comfort.
That messy space before you’d had time to collect yoursel, to process your actions and experiences and all of the new people in your life as of last night.
Space before you’ve had the time or energy to put on good face, to remember who you’re supposed to be and what your insecurities are, when your groggy, hungover, giddy and greasy. Before you remember how to be yourself and so instead are so much more.

The possibilities streatch and expand you, the laughter tumbles like a nervous boy stutters when talking to a beautiful girl and connections are made deep, below the surface of expectations and reputations. You are weaker in manyways but vulnerability is a wise monster, and vulnerability is the key to making real friends, and vulnerability is essential to growth and change and discovery.

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Heartbreaking and Hilarious Things Said to Me This Week:

“Madeleine, do you wear red lipstick when you walk down the street?”

“Madeleine, I’m trying to learn patience, and you’re really helping me with that.”

“Madeleine, certain colors are separating themselves from other colors and that’s all I know.”

“Madeleine, there wont be any fish left to eat in ten years, d’you really think my beer can will make a difference?”

“Madeline, you have so many feelings.”

“Madeleine, did you graffiti tag the mens outhouse?”
(apparently everyone knows I’d be the one to write quotes from Lolita with a fuschia sharpie)

“Madeleine, lets take the disco light inside the spaceship, if we dance we’ll sound like a chip bag.”

“Madeleine, you’re my new best friend, I knew it was official when we both said that we’re sporadically poly.”

“Madeleine, I don’t feel beautiful anymore.”

“Madeleine, do you want to learn about why the Galaxy is expanding or just continue doing your girl power super moon dance?”

Kind and encouraging words overheard at Saturdays house party:

“The number of times, that Madeleine has expressed maturity and knowing what she wants, has been, pretty much all the time since I met her.”

context unknown.

Take Back the City – Art Shows, Sex Shows, Rock Shows

Colby gave me a tour of the new Artful Dodger space/building/’crazy great place’ soon to be opening in Regina, and these were in the basement. There were also multiples of various items like sinks, ect. not just toilets out to haunt me.

…continuing on the long over due list of things keeping me busy and inspired…

-There’s a really interesting show on at the Dunlop Art Gallery right now called “Darwin’s Nose’ by Trevor Gould. The cities cutest band Love Act played at the opening reception and they ran out of red wine by the time I got there, (only 30 minutes late!) so you can imagine what kind of crowd it was, mostly good friends of mine.

My favorite part of the show are the small (8×10 I think) water color paintings of monkeys and men, particularly that of a mans profile with the profile of an ape coming out of the back of his head. One of my favorite books ever (which I’ve just started re-reading) is ‘Sex at Dawn, The Prehistoric Origins of Modern Sexuality.’ They cover Darwin quite a bit (including intense personal information) and of course substantial ancestral sex ed.

While reading it I began to reference all human actions to our ape cousins and spent hours watching videos of bonobos on youtube (do it, they’re incredible), but whatever, this book deserves it’s own blog post… or five. I love those tiny water color paintings so much and have been thinking of them ever since. There are also two huge “human like” (they remind me of astronauts) statues in the middle of the gallery, they’re painted silver and have faces stretched out five feet in front of their bodies, as well as a video loop of apes in captivity, they’re cool too.

-My girl(ie)friends Eve and Jera and I went to the Taboo sex show at The Conexus Center, which is more intense than you’d expect in some ways and not enough in others… ironically similar to a lot of sex in that way perhaps.

So many condoms, and dildos and cheep lingerie, which are all entertaining for a while (the technology alone is jaw dropping, not to mention all of the different colors, shapes, sizes… I wanted to touch them all) but eventually, they all kind of look the same, ya know?

These beautiful ladies had my favorite body paint of the night, leopard printed skin!
(I have unfortunately forgotten their names, courtesy fail)

I also loved the pole dancing show, out of tremendous respect for their technique and strength alone. One girl actually climbed up the pole while she was upside down, hung on with her arms and did a full splits with her entire torso extended away from the pole!

Roughly translates to, “fits on every pickle.”

-We later went to O’Hanlons to meet a friend who’s moved away for school and just happened upon Lou Wreath and The Fight, some ultra lovely musicians from Edmonton playing a show. We were 2 of the 5 people who danced, along with my mom, naturally. Afterwards, when they thanked us for dancing we ended up talking and hanging out for the rest of the night.

Meeting new people in Regina is rare. Meeting cute, young, talented, interesting and kind people (you don’t already know or who’ve dated one of your best friends) is next to impossible. Regina in the winter can often feel so isolated, so much of the same, so much like a drone tone. Sometimes it can feel like you’ve forgotten that these people really do exist, living only on the other side of your laptop screen. Meeting these guys, and building friendships from scratch, was like the whole world opening back up.

The Fight has a song called, ‘Take Back the City’ which felt like a perfect title for this super long on-going post… to be continued…